Underwear Saves World

To combat the rising tide of nationalism in Europe, a Swedish company has taken a stand against racist underwear.  Their new line of pants comes in six shades, ranging from light cream to rich brown.  The company explained in a paid editorial that the collection has been offered to fight the norm of white skin.

Marketing manager Jonas Lindberg Nyvang said, "We call it six shades of the human, and the reason for our launch on the UN International Day against Racial Discrimination is that the political climate in Europe has been very hard lately and we want to show where we stand. This is our contribution to the debate.”

Solidarity in Heels

Male servers at Ottawa restaurant Union Local 613 wore dresses and heels to work for part of a shift last Wednesday, after seeing on TV that some women feel compelled to wear sexy outfits to work.  Reportedly the men felt uncomfortable.  Their feet hurt.  People made jokes and stared.  It was ridiculous. We should all wear identical burlap boilersuits, and be done with sexual dimorphism.  It's a failed experiment.